Recently, I found myself in one of those conversations—the kind where you're being grilled about your decision to home educate. It started off innocently enough, but soon the questions began piling up: Why do you home educate? What about socialisation? Do you know the statistics of children out of school in the UK? And before I knew it, I was on the defensive, feeling like I had to explain myself, my choices, and my children’s futures. I left that conversation with a tight knot in my chest, replaying the whole thing over in my mind.
But then, as I sat quietly reflecting, something became clear to me. I don't owe anyone an explanation for the choices I make for my own children. And you don’t either.
If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve had similar experiences. You’ve probably been met with a few sceptical glances or had awkward conversations where you felt like you had to defend your decision to home educate. I want to tell you that those moments do not define you, and you don’t have to justify your choices to anyone.
As home educators, we’ve all made this choice with care, consideration, and love. We've researched, weighed up the options, and chosen what feels right for our children. That decision deserves respect—from others, but most importantly, from ourselves.
Often, when people ask those probing questions, they’re not really questioning you. It’s their own discomfort, their own uncertainties, that drive them to push for answers. Deep down, most people know that the traditional school system isn’t perfect. They’ve seen the cracks, maybe even felt trapped in it themselves. When they see us, doing something different, it stirs something inside them. For some, it’s curiosity. For others, it’s fear—fear of stepping away from what’s familiar, fear of challenging the status quo.
And that's OK. It’s human nature to question what we don’t understand. But remember, their questions don’t reflect on your decision. You don’t have to prove anything. Sometimes, people will never fully understand, and that’s not your responsibility.
It’s so easy to feel like we need to explain, to reassure, to give statistics or success stories to prove that we’re doing the right thing. But let’s be clear: you’re not educating your children at home to meet someone else’s expectations. You’re doing it because you know your child better than anyone else. You know what lights them up, what challenges them, and what helps them grow. You are creating an environment where they can learn, thrive, and flourish in ways that simply aren’t possible within the walls of a school. That’s more than enough.
When those questions come—and they will—you don’t need to jump into defence mode. You can simply respond with grace. Sometimes, people just need a little understanding. A simple “This is what works best for our family” can be enough. If they’re genuinely interested, then by all means, share your experience. But don’t feel pressured to explain yourself if you don’t want to.
There’s a beauty in standing firm in your choices without needing to seek approval from others. You know why you chose this path. You’ve seen the benefits for your child. That’s all the validation you need. And if someone doesn’t get it? That’s OK too. We can’t expect everyone to understand a journey they haven’t walked.
In moments when you feel questioned or judged, take a deep breath and remind yourself of the freedom home education brings. The freedom to teach your child in a way that suits them best. The freedom to watch them grow, not just academically, but emotionally and socially, in ways that are aligned with your family’s values. And the freedom to be fully present in their learning journey, creating memories that will last a lifetime.
You don’t need to justify any of that. Not to strangers. Not to friends or family. You’re doing something beautiful and brave, and no amount of questioning will change that.
So the next time someone asks why you’ve chosen to home educate, just smile, knowing you’ve made the best choice for your child. And trust that that’s enough. Because it absolutely is.
0 comments